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sprout

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Subject: ex-wife (PWC) may be about to abandon kids because of new b/f Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:24:01

I posted about a bit of this before. My children have recently been made subject to a child protection plan. All of the professionals involved are unanimous that the best information they have is that new partner poses a risk to children. Ex wife is convinced that the partner is misunderstood, and the matters that make him a concern to social services were all in the past, and he would never be a risk to her or any children. She has consistently said that she will not give up her new partner. Both kids (11 and 12) know something is up, but not exactly what, or some of the unpleasant details. I was advised to insist that one of the trained family staff from social services had conversations with both girls so they could be told suitable information about protecting themselves, and I couldn\'t be accused of bias myself. I have raised this in meetings. My ex-wife disagreed strongly with telling the kids almost anything, and has been unhelpful to social services. In the middle of last week, she volunteered that she was thinking of just letting the kids come and live with me \"because I could give them a better life than she could\" She repeated this today, and said she would make a final decision in the next couple of days. She said she was thinking that half term would be a good time for them to move too. she seems to have most of it worked out already! I live 30 miles away from my ex-wife, so the kids would need to move schools and it would be a huge upheaval for them. Our local school would accept them, and can provide support for them. Part of me thinks a voluntary agreement would be better than a court fight over residency (I am advised that my chances would be good, but not certain if it went to court right now) My mind is all over the place about all this at the moment. I can\'t imagine this stuff is happening, or for her to want to choose her new partner over the kids. I want to do the best thing for my kids. Any ideas on the best way to support them and best support to try and arrange for them in these circumstances?

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jane2005

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Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:35:00

The ball is really in your ex\'s court for a little while at least. Obviously without specific details, it\'s hard to say, but from my experience, social services will not just go away if this b/f poses a serious risk to the children. If it goes to court, it is likely that most of the work will be done by the SW - the court will request a S7 and/or S37 report about where they feel the children should live. Even if your ex splits from her b/f, how likely is this to be really true or will she just say this to \'tick boxes\' for the SW? You really need to keep talking to the Sw\'s and ensure that they know why you might have reservations about caring for the children so soon - they will want things done in a planned way so that the children do not suffer, they need to know that you are protective of your children. Hope that helps

sometimesitdoesn'twork

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 13:03:30

I think a voluntary agreement would be fine if the Mother will agree to them living with you most of the time. Once the children have moved and changed school there is a new status quo and that is just as difficult to change as a residency order. I would continue to push for trained family staff to talk to the girls. My thoughts with regard to a residency order is if the non resident parent doesn\'t return a child it\'s possible to get a recovery order in an emergency and have the children returned. Without a residency order you can make an urgent application for interim residency and a recovery order so the end result is the same. Not that it sounds as though you will need recovery order. As for support for the children, the important thing is preventing them feeling abandoned by maintaining reasonable contact with their Mother so some thought needs to be given as to how that can be managed. The fundamental basis of good contact for children in the long term is that the parents can rub along together, the court process itself makes that impossible.

jane2005

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Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:35:00

If social services feel that the children are at such a high level of risk, that they should not remain in mother\'s care and mother refuses, they can apply for a Emergency Protection order or even involve the police and ask them to do it for them (police protection order). This could apply if she refused to return them in the future also. However, this is usually only applied in very extreme circumstances if the child in at immediate risk and it is more likely that they will want to work with both parents to secure a satisfactory solution for the children. SIDW is right about contact though and social workers will encourage that with mum as it is clear that the children would want to see their mum, particularly at this difficult time. They would probably request that the contact be supervised, this can be done either in a contact centre or preferably with a trusted adult present - you, perhaps or extended family member.

sprout

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Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:24:01

Thanks for the responses! I would be happy for their Mum to have contact with the kids, though would want an appropriate degree of protection around this. I am trying to get a view on how social services regard the whole situation. They seem to be in a comfortable procedural routine at the moment, and feelnig the same urgency I do about this! I will look into the S7 and S37 reports previously mentioned for my education :-)

jane2005

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Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:35:00

Basically if your ex contests the residence order application or the judge wants more information to inform his/her decision, they will ask for the S7/S37 report. The judge will then appoint either a court social worker (CAFCASS) or a SW from the social services - in your case the latter. The SW will then liaise with the police, probation, schools, GP\'s etc, you and your ex, extended family possibly and meet with your children to gain everyone\'s views. The SW will then reccomend where the children will live and the level and type of contact the children will have. The judge may disagree with their decision but the report will give him a better idea of the situation. You would get a copy of this from your solicitor or ask for it to be sent to you if you do not have one. Either way, it could take a couple of months at least - depends on the situation and the urgency. Hope that helps.

sprout

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Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:24:01

I\'ve done some looking around.... and gone round in circles in about 20 different legal documents! Is there a short/ easy description of what the differences are between an S7 report and an S37 report?

sometimesitdoesn'twork

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 13:03:30

I\'ll have a shot. s7 reports look into children\'s background and are prepared when the judge requires background information to help him make a decision relating to section 8 orders - residence, contact, prohibitive steps, special issues. Matters relating to the welfare of the child as required are dealt with in the report. The court welfare officer meets parents separately and the children. Inquiries are made of the child protection register, school etc. An assessment of each parent is made and the views/perceptions of the children ascertained. This is weighed up against the welfare check list and recommendations made. Under s37 Children Act 1989 a court may direct a local authority to investigate a child\'s circumstances if it appears that placing a child in care or under the supervision of the local authority would be appropriate. Public law applications are principally applications by a local authority for a care or supervision order. In most cases involving social services a guardian is appointed to represent children. The consideration is whether a care or supervision order or providing services or assistance to the child or the family would be suitable. By reason of complexity, gravity or other special reason the investigations are more in depth than s7 reports although along the same lines. Where a child is thought to be at risk a local authority may apply for a care or supervision order, or take emergency protection action. If the court has directed an investigation then the local authority must give reasons for any decision not to apply for an order.

sprout

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Posted: Wednesday, December 4, 2013 - 10:24:01

Thanks STIDW!

Abraham64

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Posted: Sunday, May 12, 2019 - 11:59:16

Every person has their own lifestyle and some way of living with others we don't need to comment on that topic. And best resume companies also think that their matter is private so they need to fix it at their home not here.
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