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gotthereintheend

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Subject: advice please re financial statement Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

My ex withdrew lots of money. Got \'made redundant\' from his high powered job then spent 120k that he cashed in from shares. Then, when he spent it all and got himself in 40k of debt, he took on another job that was half the salary he was previously on in order to reduce the amount he paid me in maintenance. He failed to fill in half his paperwork on time and on three occassions our first court hearings were cancelled the day before. There was nothing I could do about it. Patience is a wonderful thing though because I eventually got the equity in the house and a decent amount of spousal and child maintenance whereas he and his mistress and their two love children don\'t have the sort of life they were hoping to live. AND, despite thinking that I\'d never get through it, I\'m now happily in love with the most wonderful man in the world!

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nemesis

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

It was obvious from bank statements that large sums had gone from our joint account into his savings account and weren\'t declared in Form E. His solicitor said nothing . My solicitor said nothing. I pointed it out - his solicitor said it was an oversight and the savings figure was revised upwards - if I hadn\'t spoken up no-one would have bothered It made no difference at court.My ex missed every deadline and was proved to have lied about just about every aspect of Form E. As advised I said nothing to the judge at FDR The only thing the judge said directly to me was that he would not tolerate any recriminations.

redchad

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

Thanks Nemesis do you know if this is a common thing cos im not happy at all i know its only 10k but cmon fairs fair. im looking for suggestions what i can do at court on the day to raise the issue, to be honest im not happy with my brief shes not very aggresive it seems my ex\'s sols calling all the shots. ive paid nearly 2k in fees and im worried that at court my sols gonna fold any advice anyone please

helpinghand

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

I am not sure what stage you are at. Your solicitor should have filed a questionnaire in advance of the first hearing (FDA) (as will your ex\'s solicitor). At the FDA the judge would decide which questions your ex should answer (and the sme for you). It all depends on the circumstances whether it is worth pushing the issue.Are they cash withdrawals or transfers? You do not say when the withdrawals took place (when the marriage was breaking down or long ago?). However 10k is a fair amount and unless your assets are really quite large it is worth pursuing (if nothing else to put a bit of pressure on them and for some negotiating leverage). If you are concerned about the money then you should insist on a question being included about it. For example it could say: \"Will [your ex] provide details of the purpose and destination of the following withdrawals, including, in the event that they have been paid into another account the account number and holder of that account:\" and then list those withdrawals you are concerned about. If they are cash withdrawals there is not likely to be a paper trail, but your ex will have to explain why she needed to withdraw the money. If she can\'t then you should be asking the court to take the view that he has used it and it is part of her share of the pot. If it has been spent on non-family expenses (nb this does not mean that she cannot spend it on meeting his personal everyday expenses) then similarly you should ask the court to view it as an advance on her share. Whether you succeed depends on how convincing her account is! Good luck

Jellylegs

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

I questioned amounts withdrawn, first judge said exh had to answer questions about them. H was evasive - a loan to a colleague which the next judge said was fine - not by me it wasn\'t. I knew it was more than that, could sense dirty doings afoot. Turned out he\'d bought another house secretly taking out another mortgage with OW, so once I discovered that that the family pot swelled considerably! (ie in property terms, not real terms as there was little equity in that place.)The \'loan\' was a similar amount to yours 12K, enough for a deposit and a few months mortgage. What a horrible, expensive mess he created with his secrets and lies, ending with him having to settle on my terms and pay costs as he\'d lied when asked if there was property involved, and once we had the details we were calling OW to court to account for the loan. He settled a week before final hearing - whites of the eyes job! An estate agent friend said what a fool he\'d been, saying \'Property always bites them in the b*m,\' I suppose she meant that it left a clear paper trail that I was able to follow by my own detective work. My advice would be to sort a clean break ASAP - challenge answers if you\'re not satisfied, but guage if its worth it in terms of legal fees and the stress of court. Make your sol work for you - be clear in what you want, you are paying, relentlessly and ruthlessly check that they are following your instructions - you are paying them, get your money\'s worth! I went to a very experienced, expensive specialist firm and felt it was worth every penny by the end, for I felt fully supported. Once I realised the depths exh had sunk to, I felt secure with sol\'s experience and ruthless persistence behind me. It was all a massive gamble, a game of bluff, lies and deceit I suppose. I was honest throughout, and was driven by a mad determination not to be beaten by such behaviour. Expensive fight, though I look back on it philosophically now, over 2 yrs ago, as an investment in my future that paid dividends. Onwards and Upwards

gotthereintheend

Username: gotthereintheend
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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

My ex withdrew lots of money. Got \'made redundant\' from his high powered job then spent 120k that he cashed in from shares. Then, when he spent it all and got himself in 40k of debt, he took on another job that was half the salary he was previously on in order to reduce the amount he paid me in maintenance. He failed to fill in half his paperwork on time and on three occassions our first court hearings were cancelled the day before. There was nothing I could do about it. Patience is a wonderful thing though because I eventually got the equity in the house and a decent amount of spousal and child maintenance whereas he and his mistress and their two love children don\'t have the sort of life they were hoping to live. AND, despite thinking that I\'d never get through it, I\'m now happily in love with the most wonderful man in the world!

Jellylegs

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

Lovely - a happy ending! Secrets, lies and deceit - good to think that honesty and patience triumphed in our cases! A hard battle though, one I never wished to enter that will affect me, and I suspect exh, for the rest of our lives. Onwards and Upwards

why?

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Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2013 - 12:54:16

h lied and continues to lie all the way through. his income needs were 4 times mine despite me having 3 children the majority of the time. his income needs alone outweighed his declared income. he spent a great many thousands of pounds on holidays, jewellery and womens fashion for gf and i have a recorded voice message which he sent by mistake with his mobile to mine and evidence of money going to a property developer and certain circumstances which also pointedthat he must have another house. we filled in a questionnaire about lots of stuff and he didn\'t actually answer the questions. all this was pointed out and shown to solicitors and it made not a jot of difference. no one seemed to notice or care that he had pussy footed around the questions. he also did not disclose all the statements he was asked to. again, despite me mentioning it several times, no one even said anything about it. they just nodded. he acts like he is above the law and im afraid i can see why. he knows all about courts having attended a few and had previous divorce. its all a farce im afraid.
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